Monday, November 16, 2009

Is it too 'creeper' to hold on to my ex's things so they keep having to come back so I can keep seeing them?

Broke up 3 weeks ago, and the Ex has come over once for some of their things, didn't get them all, not even close. I have made a pile of their things as I slowly clean every so often. I am seriously considering stashing some of the stuff so they'll have to come back a couple more times. All this so I get to see them a couple more times. Is this way to creepy/stalker like? Cause I'm not a stalker. It was their decision to break up, and I'm haveing a hard time with it. It's gets harder everyday instead of easier.

Is it too 'creeper' to hold on to my ex's things so they keep having to come back so I can keep seeing them?
Not so much creepy, as desperate. Refrain from that pool and just give everything back. Otherwise constantly having to see them and their things is going to make things even harder then they already are for you.
Reply:No its not creepy .Your still holding on to hope .I think its sweet.......
Reply:Its not creepy at all. Its rather romantic. You obviously have allot of feelings for this girl. But you are only making it harder on yourself. Let her have all of her things back and then you can start the healing process of getting over her. Its not healthy to drag this on the way you are wanting to. Bless your heart, your gonna get a new girl soon, and when you do, you will turn this exes head and she wonder if she did the right thing, all the while you are happy with your new girlfriend......... Blessed be.........
Reply:It is a bit scary/freaky. And I have a question for you. Why do you keep refering to "their" instead of him/her. You make it seem like it's more than one person...is it?
Reply:it's not creepy but why do it?
Reply:'Them'? You were going out with multiple people and they knew about it? Kudos to you, dude.





Oh, and it just means you're lonely. Can't say I blame ya, break ups are hard.
Reply:It's called being obsessive. You need to let go. Go out with your guy friends and get layed...haha....you need it buddy!!
Reply:NO, IT'S NOT CREEPY. IT'S CHILDISH. PACK UP ALL OF HER CRAP, PUT IT IN A BOX, AND CALL HER AND TELL HER WHEN TO BE THERE TO PICK IT UP. LET HER KNOW THAT IF SHE'S NOT THERE AT THAT TIME, THAT YOU'LL LEAVE IT OUTSIDE. AND FOLLOW THROUGH WITH THAT.





THIS WILL AT LEAST GIVE YOU A LITTLE BIT OF CONTROL IN A SITUATION THAT WAS COMPLETELY OUT OF YOUR CONTROL. THIS SHOULD HELP YOU TO COPE A LITTLE BETTER. BEST OF LUCK TO YOU.
Reply:Yeah, that is creepy. Get all their crap together and dump it at their house and be done with it.
Reply:Keeping your ex's belongings may be your way of trying to hold onto the relationship and is probably not in your best interest. You need to find closure and I would suggest that you remove all reminders of your ex and your time together--this means delivering all of his things to him. You need to put distance between yourself and your ex. You're not doing yourself any favors by creating reasons for him to have to be in your presence--you're making it harder. He is also being denied the opportunity of seeing that you can stand on your on two feet and develop a life of your own. If you want to get his attention, move on with your life and develop something meaningful on your own. Good Luck
Reply:Its pretty creepy and kind of weird. And the reason its getting harder everyday is you do keep seeing them. Out of sight out of mind. It takes time. And by the way you keep saying "Their stuff" and "Them" and They. Are there more then one? And if so, what right do you have to be so "heartbroken" if you were playing two girls? Give them their freaking stuff back man!
Reply:time will help you





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Reply:Actually, the faster you get rid of the stuff, the easier it will be on you. Why would you want to torture yourself day after day?





You may not have liked the break up, but it happened. Be an adult and deal with it. I know it's hard, especially when someone leaves you (been there). The only advice I can offer you, is to get the stuff back to your ex asap... In fact, I'd try to either leave it in a box outside the door, or drop it off at their work in an effort to avoid that awkwardness.


Then start taking care of yourself. Worry about you. Do things for you, that make you happy. Go out, enjoy life. Concentrate on making yourself a better person, without that person in your life.





To answer your question... is it creepy or stalkerish? No. Alot of people do this. It's human nature to not want to lose something, or in this case, someone you love. However, this approach isn't healthy for you. It will do more damage in the long run...will prevent you from healing and moving on.





Good luck


mj
Reply:maybe the better thing would be to keep one thing to remember her by and then give everything back
Reply:nahh not really but move on its oging to be better for you

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